Dolla bills, ya'll

While one of the VP's at my company is out, it's my responsibility to get coffee for the man in the corner office (aka the VP/GM of my department). It's kind of different, but I feel I missed out on my opportunity as an intern to be the coffee gofer, so it's kind of rad in its own right. Plus, there is the added bonus of being able to get whatever I want on the company dime. That only works so well, as the coffee shop the boss of bosses gets his mega breves from makes terrible coffee (but I am knee deep in bagels, boyeeee!).

No less, after nearly two weeks of going to this shop I've started to realize that I may go to a far classier joint with much more respectable clientele. The shop I go to has incredibly efficient baristas who make intensely delicious coffee for great prices, plus they get to know all of their customers. They're the classy joint on the block, and I'm an unabashed fan.

Then there is the place I get the drinks for the man in the corner. The place where on Friday's the baristas have to dress up in themed outfits (alright, maybe the bagels aren't the only good part) and their patrons seemingly do not go for a cup of joe, if you know what I'm saying. Typically, I'd be perfectly fine with it. Sketchy old dudes want to be sketchy old dudes. That's cool! I'll be there some day (let's file that one under S, for sad but true). But still, when you race in front of me and then sit and talk to the barista for 15 minutes about how manly you are (or whatever it is you're talking about) without even buying coffee, and then dropping a hefty tip (evidently a fistful of dollars is not just a Clint Eastwood movie), you are going to draw my ire.

I'm pretty sure these are the guys who aren't allowed to go to strip clubs, so they take the closest approximation they can get and drop singles on them out of sheer confusion. Or they are just sleazy. It's really hard to tell sometimes. All I know is they have it right - that coffee is terrible. I wouldn't buy any either.