A Slice of Fried Gold

To blog or not to blog

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Going to Europe. Back in May. Peace out!

The Butcher of Sears Mall

For part of my pre Europe planning, I decided I needed to go get a haircut. Generally, I think Europe prefers people to not like hobos, so I went with it. Anyways, so as per usual when I'm up against a time crunch and wanting to get a haircut, I make a panic decision and go to this chain salon in the Sears Mall in Anchorage. Pretty much always guaranteed to be a complete and utter failure, this one took it to a new level.

The problem wasn't even that it was a bad haircut (it was), it was the myriad of other bizarre reasons that presented themselves regularly:

  • It was a dude cutting my hair
  • A dude who disappeared for 10 minutes after staring at the mirror for 5 seconds and then announcing "I need to go to the bathroom"
  • A dude who I was rather convinced was high
  • A dude, who when discussing Europe with me, announced that he loves Amsterdam and had been there "3 times"
  • A dude who shared with me that his friend had paid for a blow job in Amsterdam, much to the chagrin of his 2 coworkers and the 2 ladies who were getting their haircut
  • A dude whose best haircutting techniques were the "tilt my head through violent thrusting of his razor" and "the ear cut"
  • A dude who made my typically 15 minute haircut last 50 seemingly unending minutes
  • A dude who, when completed, took hair paste to make my hair look exactly the same as his, using approximately somewhere between 45 and 21 pounds of said paste
Needless to say, I did not like that haircut. No I didn't, not one bit.

Strangely enough, I received no less than five compliments about my new haircut. Apparently weirdo drug addled stylists who may or may not be trying to murder their clients but are mighty fine at cutting hair.

Parade Talk

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Photographs of Jason and I's parade

Last night was pretty freaking epic, with Colver and I playing an awesome round of frisbee golf, going to the pub quiz at Humpy's with the Crewnit, and ending the night with fun at McGinley's with Amy, Jason and Hannah. The strangest part of the night was unknowingly walking into a victory party for mayoral candidate Dan Sullivan at McGinley's, although in retrospect, given that he owns that bar and that it was election night, we probably should have seen that coming.

This did lead to some awesome, awesome fun for us though, as Jason and I saw an opportunity and joined their parade of celebrators as they stormed the Denai'na Center amidst other candidates and their supporters. We of course had no idea what was going on, but we had fun with the fact that we were essentially infiltrating this grand moment and that people were looking at us with such esteem ("look at those young men! so patriotic!"). Pretty much the entire time that we paraded around the Denai'na with our sign being held by the two of us, we were laughing hysterically.

We ended up getting to the ballroom at the top of the Denai'na and it was like the gang gathering in the Warriors, except you replaced the gang bangers with political enthusiasts and Cyrus with Kiddie Fox.

In short, it was amazing.

Of course, we quickly bailed, drawing the ire of Sheila Selkregg supports and the admiration of a fine young lass (Sullivan supporter) as we went down the escalators. We stepped outside, and a team of Lara Croft supporters (wait? it's Eric Croft? Seriously?) were parading the grounds in much smaller numbers (it was somewhat akin to the disparity in actual votes it turns out), with one of the supporters being an outspoken lady friend of mine who I may or may not have went to two proms with. She scolded me quickly for my Dan Sullivan sign, to which I responded with first apathy and then this nugget:

"I really like parades."

You got beef with that lady? Take it up with whoever made parades so awesome.

Play ball!

Monday, April 6, 2009

Junior back in a Mariners uniform

Opening day of the Major League Baseball regular season has always been one of the best days of the year for me. I've been a baseball fanatic since I was about five, or about when Ken Griffey Jr. came into the league (this is going to sound weird, but I've always thought of time relative to Griffey coming into the league, as that is the first really, really significant thing I clearly remember), and this opening day was a special one was it marked Junior's return to the Mariners. Sure enough, he hit a home run and the Mariners won, just the way it should be.

Anyways, the point is, having baseball back just feels right. I love walking outside during breakup in Alaska, right when the dry ground starts coming out and mixing with the melting snow. It signifies that spring is coming, but also, it signifies something else: baseball. Every year, I walk out and smell that, and I have a tendency to say "it smells like baseball" to my perplexed friends or family members. I guess in a way, baseball represents everything that's right to me.

No less, welcome back Major League Baseball, Mariners, and Ken Griffey Jr. May all of you have a great season, and let's try to keep the steroids talk to a minimum, okay?

The Weekend Edition (Pre-Europe Edition)

4 more days. I'm going from really excited mode into ridiculously excited mixed with a hint of "oh my god, why am I going to Europe by myself?" but that is okay. No less, this past weekend featured, as Jason or Hannah would likely say, "everything." It was pretty fantastic. What went down?

  • Taking over McGinley's with a lot of people
  • Rocking Rum Runners and the Avenue with Jason, Joanne, and friends
  • Gumbo House deliciousness with Dad
  • Clothing shopping at 5th Ave. Mall
  • First rounds of Frisbee Golf of the year!!
  • Making cookies with Joanne (delish)
  • Potluck at Cate and Darren's
  • Slumdog Millionaire and the Sound of Music (to prepare for Europe of course!)
  • Breakfast at Middle Way Cafe with Joanne
  • Booking roughly 10,000 hostels/hotels for Europe trip
  • Rock of Love Bussing with Amy, Hannah, and Jason
It was a great weekend, and one full of fantastic happenings. I'd say my favorite thing was the opening of the frisbee golf season. Joanne, Jason, Hannah and I went out to Westchester Lagoon because it was so nice, and it felt so good to be playing again. Alaska just doesn't feel right unless frisbee golf is an option, and having it back was just a blast. Not only that, but I was bombing it right off the bat, starting the year out right.

Plus, we totally created a new FG addict in Joanne, who got discs the next day and is ready for a full season of Anchorage FG courses (possibly with some away games at Peter's Creek even). It's like the Crewnit just brought their missing member back in, gone for the winter but back again like he'd never left. Frisbee golf...we missed you.

Favorite April Fools Joke of 2009

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

My favorite part of April Fools definitely isn't the the variety of mediocre attempts at faking out friends and family members (see: yesterday). It's the ridiculously awesome ones that the internet comes up with every year, most of all the fantastic Google ones.

However, this year Thinkgeek brought their A game, from the wireless extension cord they were selling, to the wiimote that comes attached to a helmet (the Wiimet), to the "Squeez Bacon," a condiment that was ketchup but made out of bacon instead of tomatoes. Delicious.

My favorite by far was the Tauntaun Sleeping Bag, a great gift for kids who want to simuluate the scene where Han cuts open the Tauntaun and puts Luke in a tauntaun to keep him warm. Except, you know, when you're camping, or sleeping in your living room in a fort. All the time. It's especially great because the insides of the sleeping bag look like the insides of a tauntaun.

Yay realism!

Led Zeppelin coming to Alaska!

Every year, I always get really anxious for the shows that will be at Moose's Tooth Summer Concert Series, and most of the time it's pretty exciting. Cake, Wilco, Matisyahu - those are some fun artists. This year? Way, way more awesome.

July - the reunited Led Zeppelin - fresh off of massive shows that were seemingly randomly selected and ridiculously huge worldwide - are coming to Alaska.

Oh. My. God. That is what I'm talking about.