The Weekend Edition

This weekend was action packed. Seriously...there were many travels to and fro the Anchorage area, and it was glorious. Not only that, but I also managed to get a ton of rest and am feeling like I'm near 100% for the first time in quite some time. So combining fun with getting rested up into the same weekend along with some strangely great weather? Gimme some more of that I say!

Quick note: next weekend is slated to be even more fantastic. Concert, good buddies rolling into town for buddy Sobo's wedding, BBQ Sunday night, the closure of the Great Vegan Challenge of 2008, plus some partying sure to be slated in there...can I get a hell yes? Sounds pretty fantastic.

But that's next weekend. What'd I do this weekend?

• Good amount of Frisbee Golf (three rounds this weekend)
• Rocking with 3/4ths of Puma Town
• Hanging out with the Crewnit at Snow Goose
• Partying by myself downtown (seriously.)
• Sleeping until 1 pm (haven't done that since college)
• Catching Beowulf on PPV (strangely badass)
• 3 on 3 bball tourney at Alaska Club West (we lost both games *cry*)
• FG with Sharpe, Johnny, Sam, Nick, and Bob (feeling like summer 2007!!)
• Prefunking with Amy, Patrick, Sam, Nick, Sharpe, and Nate
• Having a blast downtown and at Koots with Sam, Sharpe, Johnny, and Nick
• The Sixth (Russian) Sense
• Finally finishing all of my comics!
• Having a nice relaxing Sunday chilling with my mom and friends

So yeah, it was a busy one and a good one. Of course, as per usual there has to be a primary focus. What was it this week?

I should get a shirt made with this on the chest

I had many ventures around Anchorage area bars this weekend and I stayed pretty on the level the whole time, never got too crazy, didn't spend too much money, and had a ton of fun. Friday was particularly revelatory, as I went out to the bars totally solo. You'd think that would be depressing, but I met a lot of cool new people, danced with a ton of people, had a fun bachelorette party experience, and just had a generally great time.

However, Saturday was far more fun, as my good friend Sam was in town visiting so we brought together last summers party crew for one great night of partying, with Sam, Nick, Sharpe, Johnny, and I having a blast downtown and at Koots. Highlights from that included the two bachelorette parties we ran into, my bet with Sharpe over whether or not I could successfully pick Russian girls out of a crowd (here is a hint: I can), dancing like crazy with pretty much everyone, prefunking at Amy's, and a delicious Taco Bell run to end the night.

Sadly enough, I did not bring my camera, but sometimes things exist better as memories and without photographic evidence. I think last night was definitely one of those evenings. It was one of those "had to be there" nights as even waiting in line for half an hour at a bar ended up being a blast. To say we were having a good night was an understatement, we were on fire to quote NBA Jam.

Sober Guy

After the events of last weekend (cliffs: I drank a bunch, acted like an idiot, was hungover, profit?) I decided that maybe, just maybe, I should take it a bit easier this weekend. So this Friday, I took it real easy. As in I had absolutely nothing to drink.

This worked perfectly though, because we had a couple tasty events going on, as Kim was hosting a dinner party at her place that was going to be attended by Colver, Lorna, and Hannah, with dinner prepared by yours truly and Kim, and then afterwards we were going to go catch Baby Mama. Nice sounding evening right?

Kim and I had decided that we were going to go with a mexican heavy theme, so we were preparing fish and beef tacos and attempting at rocking out some serious chicken mole. Of course, Kim's kitchen is alternately maddeningly light in terms of useful spices and tools of cooking and very entertaining in the difficulty it provides. However, Kim and I rocked out to the National while we cooked and prepared a very nice spread.

If I do say so myself, the fish tacos were the best, as whoever cooked them brilliantly seasoned them, and added splashes of lime and cilantro to really bring out the taste. Oh wait! That was me. I rule!

Our attempt at chicken mole was a bit more dicey, as Kim and I crafted the sauce with its odd mexican chocolate cake additions and "is it or isn't it cooked yet?" chicken. It was pretty tasty, but a little bland. There is the slightest chance we may not have actually followed the recipe to perfection, and it did feel like there were steps missing.

Overall though, the dinner experience was very good, and it was nice to have Crew representation at what was otherwise a Unit event (more on this later), and Hannah seemed to enjoy herself.

Wait. Did I say "seemed to enjoy herself?" By that I think I meant Kim, Hannah, and Lorna collapsed into their own world after dinner, rapidly jumping from topic to topic ranging from gossip to sheer ridiculousness, with all this fueled by Kim's vast resources of duty free liquor and the bottle of wine Hannah brought over. Colver and I did all we could to survive, as we quickly hid in the living room and talked about our fantasy teams and sports in general.

Thank god. I didn't think we'd make it for a bit.

After an hour and a half of this, we decided to leave the girls to their own devices and head off and play some pool at a local pool hall before the movie. It was fun as per usual, with Colver and I ranging from wildly impressive to horribly embarassing at the game, and the waitress who works there continues to love me (or so I assume, she constantly sneaks glances over at me all the time both times we were there - of course given events from today it may just be because my face is covered with dirt).

Afterwards, we met up with the triumvriate, and they were all wired and ridiculous. Entertaining, but man they were totally jazzed and I was unsure as to how the rest of the theater would handle our hijinks. Thankfully, it was a comedy so wild laughter was not only expected by encouraged, so the threesome fit right in.

Overall, I was impressed with Baby Mama, which managed to defy its chick flick confines and be a damn entertaining film. Of course, Tina Fey and Amy Poehler can make that happen easily, plus a cast featuring Greg Kinnear, Sigourney Weaver, Steve Martin, and Conrad from Weeds definitely can do that.

Afterwards, it was already midnight and I was 150% sober. So what did we do? We went to Eagle River to go to the Homestead Lounge, the bar of bars and home turf for the Crew. Of course, along the way there was oodles of entertainment, including the fun of yelling along to music along the way (I drove myself - I was driving Hannah and Kim from Hannah's place) and the awesome motorcyclist who was blaring the music off his ride. What was he listening to? He was listening to Snow's "Informer." Yes, there was a time in my life I liked that song. Yes, that is now the single worst song ever made.

But god, that was hilarious! This is a man with no shame!

The Homestead was of course not disappointing at all, although I started to get this bad feeling from the visit there. Is this what drunk people are like? Good god! They are ridiculous! There was this one woman who spent the entire night grinding on guys who may or may not have been dead, dancing like a stripper on the dance floor, and then dancing with an enormous man who had one move: torso and arms? You simulate an airplane. Lower half? Pelvic thrust only. She was definitely the MVP of entertainment for the night.

It seemed as if the whole bar experience was a "scared straight" ad speaking out against drinking. I kept getting the feeling while there that I am at least 13 times as ridiculous as those people (Hannah, Nate, Kim - feel free to confirm) which was alternately terrifying and fun to theorize what it'd be like.

Hannah and Olena at the Homie

It was a bit dead though, as most everyone in the crew had retired and we were left with just Sally, Olena, and Nate. We spent most of our time people watching and playing foosball (the Homie's new table rocks!), although I did discover one thing: being the only sober person in a two on two foosball game makes you look like the greatest player EVER. It was like David Beckham versus a high school team, and it was fun as hell.

Shortly thereafter, we retired and I took Hannah and Kim home for bed. Of course the night did not end there.

Oh no sir, it did not.

I had told Amy that I would be DD for her and Cate, as it was Cate's bday. Did I say earlier that people at the Homie were ridiculous? Those people ain't got nothing on this group! The experience was essentially forty minutes straight of searching for people (within the Koots parking lot and extending to many miles away), a flurry of insults and affirmations coming from Amy (which was great, because it definitely kept me on my toes), and Cate's unique form of drunken baby talk coming from the back seat. All that, and that isn't even mentioning the roving fleet of amped up Geo Metros that were apparently racing for pinks on the way back to Cate's place.

Shortly after 3:45, I made it home. This whole night started as a sober night that was supposed to be light on the ridiculousness and heavy on the fun, and one that would provide me the opportunity for plenty of rest. Two of the four goals were accomplished, as I didn't have a single drink and did have a lot of fun, but good lord - no sleep and SO MUCH ridiculousness.

All in good fun, but this definitely gives me a fresh perspective on what it must be like for sober people in bars. To all those people, I have to ask this: why do you go to bars?! That's the question of the night for sure. Well...maybe not. Why that guy was listening to "Informer" may actually trump that.

The Weekend Edition

Ugh.

That's what I have to say about this weekend.

Ugh.

It was a great time, don't get me wrong, but good god am I tired. Also, in typical David fashion, I have a deeply ingrained feeling that I made a total fool of myself but really, when do I not feel like that coming out of a weekend? That's a rhetorical question, but if it was answered there is only one answer to be had - never.

Now that that's been said, what'd I do this weekend?

• Watched Iron Man with Colver (good, but not spectacular)
• Watched Elizabethtown/Metal Videos/Ate Grilled Cheese at Amy's
• Read a bunch
• Fifth Day (More on this later)
• Free Comic Day - Best Day Ever
• Frisbee Golf with a posse
• Late lunch at Snow Goose
• Early dinner at La Mex
• Rocking!
• Partying downtown
• Watched the first disc of How I Met Your Mother season 2

Saturday is the bit I want to get into, as it was a heck of a day and a very packed one at that.

Amy ferociously consuming a McChicken

The Crew celebrates Cinco de Mayo yearly with a ridiculously alcoholic goal/celebration: drink a fifth on the fifth. In lieu of the fact that Cinco de Mayo is on a Monday this year (it's a shame really), Saturday was substituted this year. This was my first go round with this highly poisonous but likely fun day. How did it go?

Enjoying the sun on a beautiful Saturday

It was awesome! It was a strange feeling to be consuming that business all day, but it was really fun, especially considering all of the events that were going on. I picked up new sunglasses, went to Bosco's for Free Comic Day (first Saturday every May - best day ever man!), played a really fun round of Frisbee Golf, had lunch at Snow Goose, dinner at La Mex, rocked...you name it, we did it.

Nick and Sharpe playing Frisbee Golf at Westchester

The day started out as just Amy and I, but throughout the day others joined in, including (but not limited to): Jason, Jon, Hannah, Nate, Briana, Sharpe, Nick, Johnny, and a host of others. Amy and I were the only ones that went all the way with it though, which I'm unsure as to whether or not that is good for us or bad for us. Who knows these things? It's a little impressive, and a little depressing at the same time.

Hannah, myself, and Amy on the deck at Snow Goose

As much fun as it was (and it was a ton of fun, as you can likely see in the pictures) it also kind of served as an eye opener. First off, no one should ever consume that much. Ever. It just isn't natural. Second off, I make horrible decisions under the influence. I'm dumb and clumsy 99.9% of the time, adding layers of difficulty to situations by drinking is not exactly the smartest thing I could ever do. For all of the fun I had, I'm still sitting here at my computer wishing I hadn't done some things and crossing my fingers nothing comes back to bite me in the butt.

Hannah and I in maybe the best Rock Band picture ever

Everyone always drops the immortal phrase after a night of drinking: "I'm never going to drink that much again." As cliche as it is at this point, I'm going to take the time to say it one more time. Once more, with feeling. I'm never going to drink that much again. Ever. I was once told I'm an all or nothing guy, and that is an absolute fact about me if there ever has been one. I'm all in all the time, and it's about time for that to stop. So starting right now, I'm taking a step towards better understanding and applying the concept of moderation.

Briana and Amy

Shocking that it took 24 years for me to commit to such an easy concept huh?

Nate, Jon, me, and Jason

With that note, that's enough of that. There's a difference between learning lessons from mistakes and wallowing in them. The key to mending what you've harmed is going back to how you were before, not making a big deal of it, and not making that mistake again. Which is what I'm going to do.

Amy, myself, and Hannah

Back to the point though: it was a ton of fun. I had a great time. Sure, there are regrets, but to quote the single greatest film ever made (that's Bubble Boy for those that are wondering): "Don't live life with regret, ese." Boo to them I say! I got a ton of awesome pictures with my new camera, added a few more chapters to the Legend of David, acted a damn fool, met some new people, and partied down with great friends. What more could I ask for out of a Saturday evening, as a horribly irresponsible and slightly ridiculous young adult? Not much I say.

Myself and the crew - I'm the one in the world's gayest pose

The Weekend Edition

Given my incredible amounts of laziness every weekend (or the constant movement that is tied to my weekends anymore), I seem to have a pattern developed on my blog. Wait until Sunday, then either do a series of posts or write one megablog that covers the weekend as a whole. Today, I will do a mixture, with one megablog and one smaller post as that seems to make sense given the massive difference in the two topics.

Also, as a preface to this posting (and given the nature of previous posts) I wanted to say one thing before I got started.

Friends. Family members. My name is David, and I'm not an alcoholic. I swear! Regardless of my seemingly consistent weekend habits, I am absolutely not one, nor have any interest in ever being one. Want legitimate reasons?

1. Hangovers are the bane of my existence - I've never felt worse in my entire life than I did on Saturday at about, ohhhh....11:25 am.
2. Drinking = Expensive. If I was to become an alcoholic, I'd need to get a job that pays more. A lot more.
3. Alcohol (in my humble opinion) does not combine well with most foods. I am a man who loves his food, so 99 out of 100 times, milk will be chosen over the aforementioned booze.
4. I may be addicted to milk. Due to the lack of negative thoughts towards that affliction, I felt as if I could share that. I hardly have room in my life for two addictions (For the sake of believability, I will omit the fact that I am also addicted to Tuna Melts and Comic Books).

Now that I've cleared that up, back to the breakdown of my sauce soaked weekend.

Friday:

It was a long week at work. Long, long, long week. Every day started early, a few ended later than usual, and we had big time initiatives going for two products that I'm heavily involved with so the time I spent at work was even more action packed than usual. Needless to say, good ol' TGIF was heavily in play that day. Not only that, but I had two great things to look forward to.

First off, great friend and altogether awesome girl Joanne was in town visiting from Vegas, so that evening she, Colver, Lorna, Kim, and I went out to dinner at pizza joint of all pizza joints Moose's Tooth. Any event that involves going to Moose's Tooth pretty much rules anyways, they have the best pizza (in the world, not hyperbole), their beer is incredible, and the environment is the proper mix of hippies and loudness to make it an ideal Alaskan dining experience.

However, this was a truly exceptional one because everyone seemed to be in great moods and everything was pretty much perfect. The beer was delicious (Fairweather IPA for the win), Joanne and I shared a large pizza and even agreed to the halves to go with (all time fave White Pizza and occasional superstar Greek Gyro), and even the waiting experience was very solid - we had a pitcher to share while waiting, albeit for nearly 45 minutes. Seeing Joanne, as per usual, was extremely hilarious and a treat and a half. If only all of my friends could live up here in Alaska with me, I would pretty much be set, but if I could just get Joanne to live here it'd be that much better (think about it lady).

Afterwards, the second great thing to look forward to was on the plate. Amy, Kim, and I were going to go to a house party that my BFF and Amy's new coworker and friend Cate had invited us to, and I love house parties. I find them to be highly preferable to bars, so the thought of attending one after a long hard week had me totally jazzed. Plus, it was a St. Patty's Day themed party, which is great because it is my second favorite alcohol related holiday (behind superpower Halloween).

Before going to the party, I had a nice chat with transplanted Portlander Erik about going to Sasquatch, as I continue to see saw back and forth on what my big event for 2008 is going to be. I officially decided that if Erik goes, I will go to Sasquatch. No pressure Erik (you should go! you should go! you should go!). Even better? Kim showed up to my place while I was still chatting, and now she's even contemplating going. Hmmm, Sasquatch could be off the hook, to quote Buster from Arrested Development (this party has juice boxes?).

Shortly thereafter, Amy showed up and we departed for the aforementioned house party. Strangely enough, Amy had hyped this as a more "adult" themed house party, one with actual chatting and cocktails, as opposed to you know, keg stands and typical insanity. I don't really know how to describe what it really was, but I would definitely say it felt like a college house party, except it was at a really nice place rented (owned?) by very gracious hosts Mikey and Mariajose (I believe was her name...). Kim and Amy were not totally down, but stayed for an hour, after which I continued to party there. Why was that? My BFF Cate rocks, Rock Band was in full effect, and there were free drinks.

Also, the night definitely took a turn for the different after two events: Wrestlemania between Cate, myself, and the utterly surprised Mariajose (sorry about the knee to the face Cate!), and TV/Radio personality Dan Fagan showing up to party hardy with us youngsters. Myself and childhood baseball teammate Kyle goaded Cate into attempting to draw his attention with her feminine wiles while we looked on and snickered, but the savvy Fagan saw right through it and came back to chat with the completely shocked Kyle and I.

Apparently we were less sneaky than we had originally thought.

It definitely was strange to see Fagan there, but after a tiny bit of research I now know why: He was with his producer at the party, who must have brought him along. Regardless, definitely strange to be at a party with a guy who a) was likely twice our age and b) is a known personality in the Anchorage area.

After a bit, Cate and Kyle were leaving and Amy was at the Avenue, so I hitched a ride down with them so I could meet up with the crew. Amy, Hannah, Jason, and Nate were there playing Fooseball, and it was the standard grand time at the Avenue. Much fooseball and joshing around occurred, plus Amy's roommate Arianna (Friendo to some) and her entire crew showed up as well.

Of course, things got a bit heated again when Amy, apparently upset with me over the complete domination I laid upon her in a previous scuffle (or perhaps she was talking to me and I may not have been listening), decided to start pulling my hair. Myself, not being one to take that from anyone, grabbed on her far longer hair and began pulling with a considerable amount of might. Much posturing took place and the bar was closing so Amy of course made the announcement that we were going to "take this outside!"

Of course we then proceeded to wrestle on the ground outside the bar like idiots, laughing hysterically while trying to gain the upper hand perpetually to no real success. However, it was another chapter in our apparent desire to beat the crap out of each other, and another one in my "fighting with girls" legacy. It was definitely a fitting end to the night, which all in all was a very enjoyable one (although I will omit the later parts - quick paraphrasing of what my following paragraphs would be - "Amy! Don't eat those!" "Why don't you take it down a notch?" "Heyyyy Friendo." "Is this Melrose Place? Are we watching Melrose Place?").

Saturday:

As previously mentioned there is a huge negative to partying. Hangovers. It's your body telling you "that was a bad idea. Don't do that." For the under 21 crowd, I have this to say - apparently alcohol is essentially poisonous. Don't want to feel like death like I did early Saturday? Never get involved with it. It's too late for me, but there is hope for you yet. Regardless of all that, my sister was very amused by my highly precarious state, even making fun of me to her kids. Not that I didn't deserve it, but still, I was very pathetic until about 4 that afternoon, after a very lengthy nap and a particularly delicious burrito from Taco Del Mar.

That night, I was still pretty iffy from the drinking, but Colver and Lorna came over for some Super Smash Bros. Brawl action (as Colver pointed out, it is pretty much "the exact same game as Melee, except with more characters") which was entertaining, especially because Lorna's complete and utter lack of control over Yoshi in egg form. After a while of that, we headed over to Amy's for a small St. Patty's Day soiree (of course after a rather clandestine meeting with Kim outside of the New Sagaya City Market) with the promise of lime flavored Jello shots and drinking games perhaps on the agenda.

We get there, and already in attendance are Amy, Hannah, Jason (to the right with me...wearing crowns), and Jessie, and shortly thereafter Nate joined as well. After a little while of bsing and laughing, we moved on to the premier game of the evening: Spoonass. Spoonass is, to my knowledge, a game invented by that crew that is a combination of Spoons and Asshole (two other popular drinking games). Essentially the game is a flurry of rules, helmet wearing (as Amy models below), playing cards, and drinking. In short, it's extremely fun and fast paced. Also, apparently far too complex for Colver, who had zero grip on it in any way.

We continued to rip through round after round of the game, with more and more rules being added as we went along (personal favorites: saying "I'm a banana!" whenever you saw an ace, the "Woop!" rule for whenever you saw a face card, and having to drink anytime you say an S word - Amy says "So..." a lot, I say other S words constantly as well). It was extremely fun, but as the night continued, more and more people fell out of the game. Nate never played, Colver quit quickly after the complete and utter domination of his soul, Hannah dropped out due to previous night related illness, Jessie had to go home (sorry about ripping on St. Pauli Girl!), and Lorna was for real sick already.

Of course, this was all in preparation for going out anyways, so the away team for the evening was going to be myself, Amy, Jason, and Kim, or the four people remaining in the game. Before we left of course, we had to finish off the considerable in deliciousness Jello shots that Amy made. She made a batch of Tequila ones, and a batch of Vodka. At first (as seen to the left), we were attempting to consume them using straws. Mostly ineffective, although it did lead to horribly disgusting and hilarious sounds coming from Amy and Jason (I'm going to go with some sort of high pitched slurp, but I really cannot recreate it with text). This of course just led to us upping our technology used to consume it.

Well, so long as you consider going from straws to a large wooden spoon a technological upgrade. In terms of volume, it was an incredibly good decision (as you can see from Jason's experience to the right), making the clearing out of all Jello go exponentially faster and the experience even more hilarious. It was definitely not us at our classiest, but it was pretty stellar in sheer entertainment value.

After we had completed our Jello destruction, the four of us headed downtown to the only place for twentysomethings looking to have a good time in Anchorage - the Avenue. As some of you may have noticed, I have been frequenting this bar a lot. If I'm going out lately, it's to the Avenue. And why not? It's charming with its dim lighting, many gaming tables (could really use Shuffleboard), couches, great drink prices, live music from time to time, and there is a makeshift dancefloor. It's pretty much the cats pajamas.

This night was no different, as we played a ton of fooseball, including the soul shattering devestation that the incredibly intoxicated Jason and I had to go through against a pair of Fooseball hustlers, who both kicked Amy off the table AND continued to talk smack to us throughout the rest of the night. That was different, as every person we'd played with before was very cool, but these guys were not so cool.

Princesses Kim and Amy at the Avenue

Other new Avenue experiences included the terror I went through as I departed the bathroom straight into a fight (a fight that was apparently completed in the alleys of Anchorage, congrats to those guys for sucking at life), Jason and I nearly killing ourselves by taking a shot of Jameson ("it's so smooth man! I promise!" Jason says...), and the Weirdo with the Beardo. That guy spent most of the evening attempting to hit on Amy and Kim, failing miserably, and then giving up to become a pioneer on the dancefloor. This is the man who invented the "take girl and put her under your shirt" move, which was something new to me. If you start seeing this out at the clubs, you now know where it came from. It's a pretty incredible move if you ask me.

After all of this, we departed into the Anchorage night, from which we went to the only place you really want to go at 3 am after leaving a bar - McDonalds. Amy, Kim, Jason, and I split two double cheeseburgers, two McChickens, two medium fries, two apple pies, and a ten piece chicken McNugget. When I say split, I mean literally that. There was fractional breakdown of sandwiches, significants amount of sharing, and loads of ridiculousness. All I know is that was the best McDonalds I've had ever, of course at 3 am after leaving the bars everything is the best thing you've ever eaten.

So that was that, another fine weekend of partying in Anchorage, Alaska. We had a lot of fun, we acted like responsible adults, and nobody got hurt (besides the alley brawlers from the Avenue I assume, and sadly enough Cate from my errant knee). Sounds like a grand time to me!