A Slice of Fried Gold

Am I the only one? Seriously?

Thursday, December 20, 2007
Mark Zuckerberg...surely thinking of another application he can persecute me with

So today I received a message from an old friend on Facebook. Very exciting right? Wrong. As per usual, it was Facebook being utterly useless. 9 times out of 10 when I receive a "message" on there, it's some person asking me to add some new application to my page. Thinking this is necessary to see this message, I add it. Then it goes into a series of confusing messages where it asks me whether or not I would like to send a message on this application to all of my friends.

First off, why would I want to send a message to 167 people? What could this possibly accomplish? What news would I have to tell to all of them anyways?

Second off, why make it incredibly confusing on how to navigate this? Shouldn't there be a simple "no thanks" button so I can opt out of this master trap they've sprung upon me?

So instead of opting out, instead of sending a message to one person on this "fun wall," what do I do?

I inadvertently send a single orange line to 167 people. This led to 7 responses that ranged from bizarre postings that were not related to others that were openingly questioning my sanity. I'm sure the other 160 people were simply like "well, David's lost it."

The point of this?

I hate Facebook.

Back in college, I was an avid proponent of it. Back when it was information, pictures, the wall, all on a clean and clear layout. It was professional and nice mixed with all of the features I yearn for in my social network. Then Mark Zuckerberg threw the News Feed at us (Stalkers LOVE the News Feed I'd imagine) and it all started going to hell. Pretty soon we had the ascension of applications and 10 to 15 emails a day asking me if I would be interested in taking a "likeness test" or adding "Pirates vs. Ninjas."

It has went from the pinnacle of social networking, to some sort of combination of organized stalking guide and annoying widget gatherer. Yet its popularity is booming. I don't get it. I've pretty much switched over to Myspace entirely, and I don't really even like Myspace, but it is the lesser of two evils. Facebook is just one of those things that makes me feel like I am taking crazy pills.

It may sell for $15 billion dollars because its potential as an advertising supergiant, but I wish it would just go back to being the place where I got to stay in touch with my friends without having to get dragged into the ridiculousness of 13 people sending me the same image of a beer mug. Yes. This has happened to me. I wish it would stop, but I fear it's only going to get worse.

3 comments:

Raechelle said...

sorry, david. but i thought my funwall posting was quite hilarious. i'm clever, aren't i?

thanks for the boring orange line.

sheri said...

I have no facebook. I feel no need for a facebook. I don't even know what a facebook is :).

Or I'm just to lazy to maintain two stupid social networking pages and I had a myspace page first.

jo said...

amen! f*ck facebook!! ever since me and my beloved myspace met, i've been quite anti-facebook. i don't care who is now friends with who, who commented on so-and-sos page, who joined what internet cult. it's a stalker's website now and i'll have nothing to do with it!

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